Meet Mr. Hyde

All of that sounded good right? Well heres the the unedited version of how he went from Alan to Asshole! One night he picked me up after being with his boys and once I got into the car I realized he was drunk. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of going with him. Alan drove to his house which I've never been so I didn't know what I was walking into. After a few short minutes I was very uncomfortable. He was a totally different person, very aggressive and from the times we shared together before this he was always the gentleman. Being that I wasn't physically into him I refrained from having any physical interaction but since he was drunk he went for all the moves that he typically wouldn't. I was so………… Turned Off! Alan was biting me and pulling me down to the floor and I couldn't deal with it. He was trying to play fight but ended up tackling and dragging me all over the floor, he was definitely doing to much. At one point I was nervously in his bathroom calling my friends. This night started to feel like the beginning of a Lifetime movie: naive college girl falls for the first nice guy she meets at school and DUN DUN DUN. My friends and I were trying to decide the best plan of action but since I was so use to him I never bother to look at the street signs,so I couldn't say where I was exactly. How did we go from Love Jones to being locked in his bathroom with the water running so he couldn't hear me since he was banging on the door and yelling who was I talking to.

After a while I thought he's not that crazy just drunk I could handle it. As I stepped out the door to face him I thought "why did I think I could handle him?" Here I stood 5'3 130 pounds to a 6'1 200 pound man. All he kept saying was he liked NY girls cause they are aggressive and always fought back. WTH, I then knew I could only leave if he took me but playing the submissive role wasn't working for me so I had to play the psychotic black girl that will kill a n**** if he touched me wrong. After he realized I was either really crazy or just serious he took me back to my dorm. The next morning, I received a long text with an apology saying he's sorry but doesn't remember what happened. Yes, I know he was drunk but he revealed a different side and that drunk mess was scary. I was tryna be grown, left to be with a guy I've been seeing for a short time w/o telling my roommates. Well in the end they found out anyway and not for good reasons.

Dr. Jekyll

After the debacle that was Lance I wanted to take it very slow, just concentrate on school and get a handle on it. Once I got the swing of things I met Alan, a senior, he was so far left from me that I thought why not? He's from Chicago and our 1st initial meeting was when his organization was giving lessons on how to step as in "STEP in the name of Love," just so happen I was his partner. Within the next few days I realized we had a few classes together, funny how you don't notice someone until they are smack in front of you. We held minor conversations that eventually led to our 1st date. The first time we went out was very interesting and cheap but it was cool with me. He took me to a museum(which I love) and later went for ice cream… how PG! Alan was very boy next door just not the door that would be found on my block. I wasn't use to this kind of guy; the kind that made sure to walk on the outside of me while in the streets or opened car doors coming & going. I never knew that men should do these things, so it was a pleasant discovery. Due to him being a senior in the same school he was able to help lead me in a good direction. We went on many dates to follow: nba games, concerts and gallery openings. One of the most memorable outings occurred after our movie date he dropped me off only to ask me to grab a coat and come back down he had a surprise, now who doesn't love surprises, so I followed his direction. We drove to the monument and walked around late at night which at this time was beautifully lit, ran throw the unexpected sprinklers and just talked all nigh about life and random facts. It was like a scene out of LOVE JONES. Even though he wasn't the typical guy I would go for I thought maybe that was a good thing, hey in the short time I've known him we did more things then the people that came before him. So what's wrong with this one,right?

THE CONTINUATION!

I was taken back from the realization that my so called boyfriend was really on the other end of the phone. The first thing he said was why are you playing on her phone and then proceeded to tell me it was over and we should just be friends. Friends…Friends are you serious after all of this do you actually think I would wanna be your friend? So at this point I'm screaming at him how I just wanted to be friends but you came to my school asking to stay together, like for real Lance. Blood is boiling and I'm sure I called him every explicit word I could think of and then some, I ended the conversation by simply saying I hope she gives you everything that I wouldn't. Literally, within seconds he calls back on his phone crying and saying, "he was put on the spot". Click! Don't call me. I had a slight thought for a second that I was being punked but came to the realization that this was the real thing. I received multiple phone calls from his friends trying to rectify the situation but whats done is done. Still to this day I can't believe that he disrespected me, our 2.5 yr. relationship over a chick he's known for a month. The following weeks to come I got flowers, candy, numerous phone calls and money entered into my account .. sorry money can't by my love.

After a few months around my birthday I received an anonymous phone call and it was him, for the 1st time I accepted it. I allowed us to talk and form some type of communication. After all he was my 1st real relationship and within those years a best friend. Later that year Lance surprised me with an elaborate skit that he took from Common's "come close" video and ended it with a proposal. Definitely was not the way to fix things, I accepted it since it was done publicly but behind closed doors I set that ass straight. We could never be back to the old Jada &Lance, he changed all of that with a phone call. Years later he is still present in my life but to many things occurred to repair: the baby that came before me but wasn't told about, the chick he cheated with and the other memorable moments. No I wasn't perfect either, no one ever is but his mistakes cost us something special. Lance to this day ask for forgiveness and if I could ever be more than a girlfriend, could I ever see myself as his wife. There are times when I wonder if we were suppose to go through this to end up together in the end. We got together so young and out of all my relationships to follow he still pops up. Who knows what God's plan is but….. WHAT IF?

I'm inlove w/a man nearly twice my age

Ok, maybe not twice my age but definitely older! When your in high school you typically date classmates or people in the same group. Well Lance was in a different class, actually the graduating class, much older than me. Funny how that week I said, "dating older guys didn't make sense to me," then I met one and was in a relationship with him for years. Lance was in a different lane and I was happy to finally be with someone that wasn't trying to be the bad boy and was over the HS scene..… so I thought! He was the older guy with a pretty smile, nice car and his own place. BAD, BAD BAD! He definitely knew how to put on a smile for the family though. Lance wasn't your usual bad boy for the stereotypical reasons, he was bad cause he was sneaky and very charming(ugh charming mofo).

Lance and I were building a strong bond and I could actually say he was my 1st real relationship; families were met, holidays were shared and public scenes were displayed. I remember one scene that was displayed that changed our relationship which happened my first week of college. I, beforehand wanted to take a break but he was not feeling what I was bringing to the table, so on a random day he came to visit. Lance confessed his strong feelings and proceeded to inform me why we needed to stay together. So I fell for it and decided to take it slow and work on things. Three days later I got a phone call(that call that all females dread). It was some chick informing me that Lance was her man and I needed to back up(at this time we've been together well over 2 yrs.). I remained calm and told her to not call me, call Lance and handle it. Now I'm confused, was he not just at my school begging to stay together and within a few short days later this heffa calls… hmmm! So I then called Lance and told him the situation, of course he seemed confused. After playing phone tag btw the two of them the random chick calls and asked,"what's up". I (still calm) told her I'm tryna do a 3way to get the bottom of this, homegirl told me cool he will be over soon, they'll call me. What? I'm about to go in…. Why within the hour I received the call from her phone and to my surprise it was his voice.




FIND OUT WHAT THAT CONVO WAS ABOUT NEXT!