Check all that applies

I've read, heard and gotten advice from all different avenues about men and how to keep them. Sometimes it felt as if Oprah was sitting in my living room giving well-needed advice. I have always heard about a checklist and not for just men but for many aspects of life. Here's how its done,you write down your goals or wants rather, seal it and put away until it comes true. As a ridiculous experiment I wrote one up about a man since that was the topic on the television(didn't just pick that topic as if I'm in dire need). To me,I think my hopes, maybe even requirements were pretty realistic nothing that would seem impossible but as years have passed it's starting to look like it. Yes, I have thought about reevaluating and scaling some things down but just didn't want to, don't want to believe that its not possible.

A few months after I wrote it I met a guy named Danny. We were getting pretty serious or thats what it appeared to be. I did have a great time with him or so I thought until I was cleaning out a drawer and found the "list". My hopes on the list didn't reflect the guy I was seeing at the time. The only part that he had was all physical nothing emotional or mental about him met what I really wanted. Even though I brushed it off as a nonchalant experiment it was still my true feelings. So now I'm stuck in a dilemma of continuing to waste my time or enjoying myself and screw what was written. I began to lie to myself and say," well my list requirements are for a husband not for just anybody" but if I'm dating you somewhere down the line we'll come to the crossroads of becoming more serious or me getting stuck in the "whatever" happens role. If my males friends were to read the list would probably say I am thinking to much or I'm describing a women because it isn't in men to contain the characteristics I seek. Men are suppose to be providers not romantics, but strong not sentimental. I tried to provoke more out of Danny and see more than just looks but when that's all you have it isn't much. It is absolutely frustrating being with someone that has the potential but doesn't care to embrace it.

As time persisted his con's simply outweighed the pro's and with that there isn't really a point anymore. I decided that 2010 was going to be the year of the lames and maybe they will have more to offer because they are happy to have you, instead of a man that believes he looks better than you. Ambitious, hard working men…Check, Pretty Boys…. No Thanks!


Check out next to see if I hold true to my new found belief

The Poser

Its Diddy hold up, its Diddy say what. Nah I'm lying, Khalif is a guy I met at Diddy's party and if he did not think it was the 90's and he was Puff himself, in the club with a floor length mink, yes it was January but we are in the club and they have coat check. I initially didn't notice him as I was dancing with an actor who just played Notorious B.I.G in the movie. He and I was dancing until I was heavily approached by Khalif, I was entertained by his attire that I just went with it, the atmosphere was good and I was enjoying myself so why not. We exchanged numbers and off I went with my girls. The very next day he calls and that right there just showed me his age, a guy my age would've at least waited a a day or two. Khalif quickly told me of his profession as he claimed to be a "producer" of an up and coming rapper. I never heard of the rapper at the time but he is definitely known now, SMH! Khalif easily stated that he has money and wanted to share it with someone and broke down the rules and regulations of how this comes about.

1. He doesn't give up money for free, we're grown so I know what's up. Yikes
2. If ever he was in town I should be available at all times.
3. If I'm not interested believe him there are many girls that are.

Is this how men are these days or is it just the assholes with money? I couldn't believe that I was just proposition. I talked it over with a few friends and sadly my girls were all for it. No one question the harmful truth of I really didn't know this man. They asked if I can bring someone then they will go too. No longer than a week was Khalif asking me to fly to Atlanta and stay with him. We would go shopping, attend parties and have a great time, with an offer like that who could refuse, things like this do not happen often but I still wasn't warming up to the idea. I guess he could sense my hesitation and decided to put fire under my butt. Khalif let me know that I didn't have a long time to decide and reminded me of how there are other females willing and excited to jump at the chance. Remember one of his rules, "I'm suppose to be available at all times". When people talk to me like that I do the opposite and say the wrong thing and the wrong thing being…. take them if you got other females why are you calling me. I guess he wasn't expecting that from a young girl so tried to take another approach and ask have I ever been flown some place is this new to me. Once again, I had to shock him and say no and truthfully it was no, I have been flown places before by a guy the only difference we were in a relationship. I don't know this guy and decided to cut losses can't miss someone I never knew, but I did pick up a paper much later to discover that Khalif's team was being investigated and so happy I was smart enough to miss that bullet. So thankful that I wasn't in a remake of a hood classic novel as it sounded to be.