Timing

......means everything in all aspects of life. Jobs, apartments and most of all relationships. Sometimes people are not emotionally available to be with the next person as much as they hope to be but is that a honest statement or just a scapegoat? There are times when you do meet someone but you two just happen to be in different places in life. I remember reading that a man(a good man) can not be with a woman if he does not have his life together first. Yea they may have women to entertain them but no one that will make the cut officially. So as a female is this fair? No, of course not. Does it happen? A lot more than it should.

At a young age I was in a serious relationship. While my friends were young and hanging out I was with one specific person doing the couple thing and having quality time with each others families. My relationship went from high school onto my junior year in college, there was a proposal and everything. When that chapter ended I just wanted to be free and date as many people as possible nothing too serious I already did that. So any guy I met in the meantime unfortunately I wasn't prefer for. Now that it was years later and I met someone, still not in the best place to try it I was willing to. Sadly, karma came back around and the guy that I thought I wanted wasn't in the mood for a relationship, but 'liked" me a lot. Never did I think I could change his mind or try to but I didn't cut him off either. I realized we wanted two different things and therefore made no point to continue on, but it wasn't that simple. Feelings have now gotten involved and some great moments shared, to bad for all the good there were a lot more bad. You would think if I felt this way and expressed it then he'd feel the same and would also want to move on but he didn't. He was willing to go the rounds with me because he rather argue with me than be good with someone else.

I could lie to myself and wait until some real feelings surface but I won't it's painfully obvious. So I appreciate that he told me he "likes" me a lot but can't be with me and only me instead of having me believe we were committed to one another only for him to cheat. Even with that mature realization it doesn't make it any easier. It is unfair that I am ready now and the guy I'm finally ready to do that with isn't. What makes us emotionally unavailable?