The topic of friends/lovers has come up rather recently and I must say I've learned firsthand what I prefer. Nothing like a moment in your life to put things into perspective. I've had many male friends, some closer than others but no one to ever make me think more. Gary was that friend that I shared my life story with in a very short time. Have you ever met someone that it was just easy to talk to? Gary was around for much of my relationships or lack thereof, he watched me; cry, struggle, fall in-love and out. Throughout all my situations going on he was the calming male side helping me see the other side. Over the yrs. there were talk that Gary was secretly feeling me and was ready to take our "friendship" to the next level. Well, I on the other hand prefer just to maintain the friendship,male/females platonic relationships are hard to come by and I wanted to keep it at bay. After yrs. and a few blimps in male selection I finally decided maybe he was right after all.
So it began we went from being Jada and Gary as friends to Jada and Gary the couple. I can honestly say it was cool for a few short months but then went sour. I was so apprehensive in the beginning that I still treated us as friends with an extra something. After Gary crossed over into a frat and got into that lifestyle it was a wrap for me. I became like the athletes girl before they got signed; I helped him learn his materials,sewed his clothes after they beat him out of them and now that he crossed I'm way at the bottom of the list of priorities. Gary reassured me that he wanted to make it work since he was trying to get me for a very long time, so my point is why are you doing everything to ruin the possibility. We went from talking all the time to now text messages which was a mess they can easily be misinterpreted if you don't understand the tone in which they are sent. Forget the relationship.. our friendship was becoming a distance memory.The moment that I knew we could never come back from was when I was hospitalized and everyone that was close to me reach out, checked in and take care of. Gary wasn't one of those people which is disappointing cause we spoke as my friend was taking me in, while everyone else found out word-of-mouth. Never once did he mention to come by, people I just met within the year even came by. One of my good friends saw Gary one day and asked if he checked up on me yet and his punk ass said, "he didn't even know"(insert BULLSHIT face now). Gary use to be the guy that bought my favorite snack just cause, the guy that helped fix my car or the guy that filled my room with balloons on my birthday and found my all-time childhood movie and watched it over and over for hours. What happened? He literally chased me for years, got me and then left me. Could it be that's all I ever was… a challenge?
I understand not dating friends cause I too lost a great friend but maybe he was never really your friend just someone buying their time until you wanted to be with them. Guys do that all the time.
ReplyDeleteIt's possible that he really liked you and wanted to be with you at first. I come to realize even good friends don't seem to do all he was doing for you, he wanted to be with you and was showing you that he could be a good boyfriend (hidden agenda). But after a while of you not wanting the same thing it could have become more about the challege..This is all speculation, men are very odd dumb creatures so who really knows!
ReplyDelete